I miss my friend

Published on February 11, 2006 By Charissa Kaschel In Personal Relationships

So my best friend of 6 years and I have finally parted ways I think. She moved to ireland and is doing missions work. I live here in the states and am raising a son full time. She was home to visit when I had my baby, infact she came back specifically for that. She was home for a month, and I saw her maybe 4 times at the most. Now, it might just be me, but if my best friend were to have a baby I"d be there all the time and doing whatever I could for her. But it seemed like, because my life was changing and going a different way.. she just wasn't headed that way. She is also jealous of my other best friend and hates it that I spend more time with her. However she only lives 2 hours away as opposed to continents away. So since she's been back in ireland for about 3 months now, I have yet to hear from her. She even missed my birthday. And as much as I love my other best friend. I miss her. We had some much fun together and have so many laughs and great times. And I truly miss talking to her and her companionship. Even though at times she became nuts and assumed things that were way off. In a way... i even miss that. I never wrote her to tell her how I felt about the whole thing because her parents just got divorced and I know she has a lot on her plate. And i can't help thinking that somehow it would just make things worse.

When I first moved out of my parents house, I got to know a different group of people and she never was crazy about that . It was as if if all my time couldn't revolve around her, she thought I was mad or something like that. but i slowly got used to the clinginess and when I needed a break, I told her.

I was so excited for her to come home this time.. I told everyone about it. and then.. i barely saw her. I don't know.. it's hard to explain. I"m glad she's growing up and making friends. She needs to find out who she is and I guess that might mean not including me. but it is rather sad. the loss is insurmountable

even though I have spectacular friends now

and I love them dearly. I do miss her

Comments

Joan of Arc

on Feb 14, 2006

Relationships go both ways, you know. Write her and let her know where you are in this whole thing. Silence leaves her to interpret and you to interpret what it means. People having a busy or difficult life is not a reason to stay disengaged--it is not protecting them, it is actually abandoning them, if anything. Of course you are feeling abandoned yourself...

Tractorman

Moderateman

on Feb 14, 2006

my best friend lives in New Hampshire, I live in California, we fly to see each other once a year, either she comes here or I go there, we call everyday and let each other know how much we value each other. It takes alot of work to keep a good friendship alive and growing, but it is worth it.

Tova7

on Feb 14, 2006

This happens a lot between women with kids and their friends without.

My advice. Keep in touch and someday she will have kids of her own and you all will pick up right where you left off.

At least it happened that way in my life several times over.

Good luck.

Charissa Kaschel

on Feb 15, 2006

i just noticed i had comments here. thanks for the advice. i am in the process of writing her

mick

on Feb 15, 2006

I was talking to my friend recently and she mentioned how it's stragne that guys can go for 6 omonths without talking to each other and then get together and it's like no time has past. If she didn't see one of her women friends for that long the friendship would be over.

I oticed that with my fiance too. She has to balance her time between her friends and make sure she spends enough time with each of them. Seems more like work then a friendship. I have friends i haven't talked to in a long time, then just drop by and it's like old times.

I guess guys just seem to have it easier.

Charissa Kaschel

on Feb 16, 2006

it's not that I in the relationship can't go periods of time without talking to her. It's her... she gets upset when I don't talk to her or email her all the time... But I guess I'm more of a guy in that respect.. ( not in the wron way) but I have lots of friends that I can go weeks without talking to and pick right up where we left off.

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